Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up with a kayak in my amazon shopping cart with 1 wrong digit on my credit card and the transaction wasn't going through.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Randomize