it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
She's just so happy...and so naked.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
Of course i made out w him. He was painted green. You know of my secret longing for the Hulk.
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Randomize
