hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I just Googled "how to lose weight but still be an alcoholic."
while she was riding me, she looked at me and said "this is why mom told me learning how to ride a horse would be important for my future"
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Is this like a preordered booty call?
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize