don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
Why aren't you two playing Dora the explorer with each other's genitals yet?
I am never drinking with the goths again.
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
