y did u give ur computer a hand job?
well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
The cops high fived after they tackled you
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
