i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Our orgasm ration was 1:45. No. Fucking. Joke. I thought I was going to die.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
Randomize
