That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Carson when you get home I want you to go downstairs and go into each bedroom and pick up the underwear and either throw it out or give it back to the people who own them. Look all over the room. Thank, Love Mom
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.