Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Just bought a McDouble with a tightly rolled dollar. The lady just gave me a sad face...
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
Randomize
