My underwear smells like fireworks.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
The moment that kid turns 18, I will have his sperm for all three meals.
Oh God. You're going to jail
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
