bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
There was one thing about my NYC trip I forgot to tell you: I took a dump in Trump Tower
Are these your boobs on my camera?
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