sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
