carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize
