I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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