I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Sorry my moustache came off because I was face first in a layered bucket full of jello shots.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
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