question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
She called me her ex's name in a supermarket. How boring am I that she livens up shopping by thinking of another guy?
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
I've discovered the best way to avoid rehab is to not fuck fat chicks when your drunk, therefore delaying regrets and rock bottom
your the Dr. Phil in my life
Today is an unchanging day
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
Randomize
