If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
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