pedialite and red bull = repair kit
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
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