Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
that's an acceptable place to lick
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Yeah. I found my shirt from last night while walking back to the bar to get my purse/phone this morning. I'm never going to even ask what actually happened. Be glad you moved 7 states away.
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
Randomize