i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
siamese drinking twins saturday is a go ... bring duct tape.
"But puppies!" Is not an acceptable excuse for trying to drunkenly steal someone's dog, you promiscuous midget!!
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
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