she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Last night I recall my hair going up in flames. This is evident by the burnt hair smell that is following me around this morning
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
Randomize
