so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
