the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
Randomize
