The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
