At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
Monday: I just need a drink Tuesday: OMG no more this week! Wednesday: oh shit how'd I get drunk Thursday: I'm glad you've stopped the pretenses
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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