Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
i can't believe i had my finger in that
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
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