I'm texring you during a blow job. She thinks I'm looking shit up. Fml. Ftw.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
23 Roommates Share Secrets Their Roomie Thinks They Don’t Know
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
29 Cringeworthy Situations People Realized They Shouldn’t Be In
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
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