that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
come over, blizzard of oz party. dress up.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.
My only regret is not throwing up on the conveyor belt in the dining hall
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
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