There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
