i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
No it'll be my boobs and the luge part will be from my nipples. Everyone will be sucking beer from my perfectly sculpted and partially melted tits.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
