i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Less talking, more tequila
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Randomize
