ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
You will receive a large, large reward, worth much more than the actual phone you are holding, paid not only in cash but in sexual favors, if you return this phone! Please respond if you're interested in cash/sex/or just being a good person. Thanks and hope to hear from you soon!
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
Bold words for someone NOT on a unicycle
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