she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
How many fucks given?
0.12846
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
Randomize
