i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
She started telling me about this odd patch of smooth skin under her boobs. Not sure if she was hitting on me or looking for free advise from a doctor...
I mean, I still played with her tits for like 20min tho.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
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