Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Randomize
