I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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