He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Can we talk about how i drunkenly changed the timezone on my phone last night and just showed up to work an hour early
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize
