Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
hahaha! you have a girlfriend
tell that to the new girl at work who i screwed on the washing machine today...
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Just thought you should know the man you CHOSE to father your children has once again fallen asleep on the toilet. thanks mom
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize
