It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
He used my blackberry to make a voice recording of me orgasming, then set it as my ringtone while I was sleeping. I discovered this during a staff meeting this morning.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Randomize
