just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
you made out with another girl for some wings
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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