you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I just woke up in my closet, wearing a pink cowboy hat and a pink thong...
I want my thong back.
I hate you tequila.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
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