Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I love him more than I love myself. Which is a lot...Because I'm narcissistic.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
Randomize
