I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
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