yo I sort of want to fuck rachel maddow. but I'm not a lesbian. actually I reaally want to so maybe I am a lesbian. at least on weekdays at 9.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
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