just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
My grandmass entire neighborhood is over for dessert and i'm high as fuck...about to make a couple of freshman boys real uncomfortable
Freshman in high school? Just your type
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
Randomize
