Texts From Last Night

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  (910): View more from North Carolina

  I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.

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  (910): I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome. http://tfl.nu/9kjh
  Replies (27) Good night (10058) Bad night (923)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.

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  (860): Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth. http://tfl.nu/vl66
  Replies (16) Good night (1504) Bad night (5986)
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  (870): View more from Arkansas

  She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...

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  (870): She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again... http://tfl.nu/jy0r
  Replies (18) Good night (5006) Bad night (1583)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.

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  (970): I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not. http://tfl.nu/wxss
  Replies (19) Good night (7612) Bad night (1087)
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  (585): View more from New York

  Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there

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  (585): Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there http://tfl.nu/9lof
  Replies (12) Good night (5315) Bad night (1306)
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  (281): View more from Texas

  seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout

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  (281): seriously my hangover is so bad I feel like my eye lashes make blinking a workout http://tfl.nu/w9k1
  Replies (6) Good night (2582) Bad night (1402)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo.

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  (330): She's cheated on every boyfriend she's ever had with the same guy. She's like a slutty yo-yo. http://tfl.nu/dqo9
  Replies (20) Good night (3594) Bad night (1545)
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  (407): View more from Florida

  Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.

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  (407): Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30. http://tfl.nu/fgkn
  Replies (13) Good night (859) Bad night (1278)
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  (509): View more from Washington

  This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.

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  (509): This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats. http://tfl.nu/orv1
  Replies (4) Good night (767) Bad night (443)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week

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  (770): Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week http://tfl.nu/af2g
  Replies (1) Good night (826) Bad night (349)
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  (818): View more from California

  Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood

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  (818): Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood http://tfl.nu/uhdt
  Replies (1) Good night (397) Bad night (628)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.

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  (724): At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped. http://tfl.nu/hng6
  Replies (0) Good night (546) Bad night (461)
• Favorite

  (212): View more from New York

  Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?

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  (212): Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows? http://tfl.nu/t64o
  Replies (9) Good night (675) Bad night (357)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.

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  (734): I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job. http://tfl.nu/64oo
  Replies (2) Good night (412) Bad night (270)
• Favorite

  (561): View more from Florida

  Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"

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  (561): Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica" http://tfl.nu/n1e0
  Replies (2) Good night (510) Bad night (166)

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