Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Two words: nipple clamps
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