Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
VASECTOMY FOR THE WIN
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
