is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I passed out and woke up with my pockets full of Lucky Charms cereal and chocolate coins. Another successful St Pattys Day.
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
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