Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
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