You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
Who wears a wallet chain?!
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I currently look like a drunken mermaid, god I love beach parties.
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Randomize