Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I was high enough to think that mac-n-cheese w/ ketchup, tortilla chips w/ ketchup, and milk was a fancy dinner
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I don't want to resort to having sex with people that actually like me.
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
