At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
No? The only contact I've had with him for months was when I drunk texted him from Costa Rica to say that all jazz sounds the same
Oh, btw, UPS might come by. Drunk me ordered us $75 worth of gummy airhead starburst type candies. Whatever it is, it'll be delicious.
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Randomize
