I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
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